We know that he
worked as a carpenter
until
he gave it up to
travel
tell stories
and generally
piss off people like me
We know that he
was a homeless man
without
his own bed
he relied on the
starry sky and the four walls
of friends and strangers
for brief moments of solitude
and rest from it all
We know that most of his
close friends ended very badly
either
tortured and executed
for association with the Jew
or
exiled to a distant island
plagued by terrible visions
in old age
We know that he
was not a social climber
managing
to make powerful enemies
whenever he opened his mouth
he turned to the broke
dined with tax collectors
walked openly with hookers
sat too close to the sick
talked too long to the criminal
We know that he
was sold down the river
by one of his best friends
for around
twelve thousand
That he
spent his final years
on the run from the government
That he
turned down the desperately
hoped for plans of a Coup d’etat
That he
talked more than anyone else
about unfashionable things like hell
That he
willingly rode to his execution
on a borrowed ass
And yet we still believe
that
Jesus’ main objective
through his hard living
and bloody slaughter
was to make you a
millionaire
To make sure
That your life is
as comfortable as possible
That your kid
attends the right college
That your mortgage
is paid up
That your portfolio
is properly diversified
That your career
moves from success to success
That you are given due respect
for your efforts
And finally
that your confidence
in the Dollar, the Euro and the Yen
is so complete that it
blots out
any need
you may have once had
for his
presence
_____________________________________
Robert Bruce is one of the most read, linked, loved and reviled poets working on the web. He writes at KNIFE GUN PEN every Monday from Portland, Ore. Get more over at Twitter. If this did something to you or for you, go ahead and spread it around...
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ouch
Nice.
Wow. A tremendous message, wonderfully rendered and phrased.
Ouch, indeed!
I am SO not equipped to be a critic of poetry. My credentials basically consists of 9th grade English, and reading what you write here.
But I’ve never been one to let lack of knowledge get in the way of expressing a good opinion, so here goes:
I like this – it’s in a much different tone than your recent work, but I like its growl.
I think though, that the poem would be more powerful and more effective if you ended it right after
That your life is
as comfortable as possible
To me, the poem builds and builds pressure right up to that one point. You drop that line (and the stanza before it) and lead the reader right off the edge of a cliff.
The remainder is repetition; kind of like punching a guy after kicking him in the balls – not really necessary, and a bit obnoxious.
What I’m trying to articulate here is that the poem is more powerful if I, the reader, am allowed to fill in the ending with my own hypocritical reflection.
For me, there would be more drama and power in the poem if you left it open for me to hang myself.
You raise an interesting point my friend.
Awards season is soon upon us. For me, this reads as a wonderful shot across the bow for those of great means who will recite emptily the phrase “First, I want to thank God.”
Utter crap.
As I sip my well-deserved bourbon, I wonder what God really thought of that “original song” from that animated movie? Hmmmmm… The mind positively reels.
Yours,
Mantooth
That you are given due respect
for your efforts
Are you talking about you or me?
Blistering, and dead on.
awesome, i think i said you your ‘mybloglog’ page that i’ve never really found poety quite as powerful or as interesting as i perhaps should have, but i’m really enjoying yours.
That’s just fine my friend…. neither do I.
this is by far the most effective, kick-ass, take no prisoners poem you have ever written…..
I come late into the fray here Robert, but better late than never. I love your vehement stance here and I feel a similar type of anger as you, but I often wonder, could I take it one step further and offer ideas on a way out of this, not a definite solution, just a strategy? So far I have none.
Yes… A vague recollection… Perhaps another well deserved bourbon would jar something loose… Here’s to trying!
Yours,
Mantooth
nice, thought-provoking. does this mean the millions i’ve just decided to “attract” (per ‘The Secret’) may not — poof — materialize?
ps i wouldn’t edit after ‘comfortable.’ the laundry list really illuminates your point. those specifics of yours made me consider my own list of prayers, and whether they were appropriate.
I’ve been on the road–and unplugged–so I’m late.
This poem reminds me of what my five year old daughter said when she saw the cover Your Best Life Now. “Daddy, he’s scary looking.” Yep.
As for the redundant ball shots that Peter referenced. They are all deserved. There’s no greater blasphemy than some of the crap that happens in churches.
I’m sort of disappointed. I came here for pointers, thinking, you know, maybe Bible verses that would help me pick my lottery numbers? Was anybody else mislead by the title? Oh, and does this also mean I SHOULDN”T trust everyone before they break my heart?
I have enjoyed your site today. A pleasure and a thought or two.